Reading Between the Vines

Some people have anxiety dreams about falling off a cliff—mine are about restaurant wine lists. In my nightmare, I'm handed a large leather-bound book that looks like a prop from Lord of the Rings. Within it, somewhere, lies the Secret of the Ideal Wine, the one perfect drink for my friends and me.

I know I'm not alone in this dark vision: Most people would rather peel a thousand grapes than choose wine from a restaurant list. Here are a few tips on choosing a good wine from a restaurant list—and how to avoid what I call the Vinous Fly Traps; aspects of ordering and drinking restaurant wine that make you feel like a bug drowning in icewine.

Ask for help. Find someone to help you, usually the sommelier, the bartender or "someone who knows the wine list well." Most of us will ask how a dish is prepared or what its ingredients are, even though choosing between salmon and lamb is much simpler than picking one of thirty merlots. Ask which wines the sommelier is most excited about or, "What can you tell me about this wine? Does it pair well with some of the dishes on the menu?" You can help the sommelier by mentioning wines you've enjoyed in the past to give her a sense both of your favorite style and price range. Or you can point to something suitably priced on the list and say something like, "Do you have anything like this that's full-bodied and not too oaky?" (or whatever your style preference is).

Match Your Meal. Often you and your dining companion choose different dishes: You're having steak and she's having fish. If the restaurant offers the option, you can order half bottles or wines by the glass. Or you can try to find a wine that matches both dishes: Some wines such as riesling and pinot noir can pair with a wide range of dishes because they are neither too full-bodied, nor too light. European wines generally tend to be more balanced and food-friendly than New World ones, which can be fruit-heavy and oaky.

Expensive Doesn't Mean Better. I use the Wolf Blass Yellow Label Index: knowing the retail price (about $17) of this popular but overrated cabernet sauvignon from Australia, I can usually figure out the markups up the other wines. Higher up the scale, I use my Veuve Clicquot Non-Vintage Champagne (about $58) Barometer. Many diners actually mistrust a moderately priced wine, assuming it's no good. But if you know the markups (100% is considered reasonable to cover a restaurant's operating costs), you'll know if you're looking at plonk or a fairly priced wine.

Drink Local. Focus on the area of the list that seems best stocked, which often is wine that complements the restaurant's cuisine. An Italian trattoria usually offers lots of chiantis that are great with pasta; or those red velour-draped steak houses will likely be strong on full-bodied cabernets that pair with meat. If you're dining in a winemaking region, such as the Niagara and the Okanagan, local wines are often a good bet. They're usually cheaper (because there's no import tax and shipping costs); they'll complement the local cuisine; and the owner may know the producers personally, and be familiar with the wines.

Go for the Best Values. Some of the best values are from lesser-known regions and grapes. Look for New Zealand and South African sauvignon blanc, German and Alsatian riesling and Chilean chardonnay. For reds, try South African and Australian shiraz; Oregonian, Canadian and New Zealand pinot noir; Chilean cabernet; Argentine malbec, Rhone grenache; Loire Valley cabernet franc and red blends from Portugal as well as the southern regions of France and Italy.

Conversely, some of the worst values are often the big-name grapes from big-name regions, such as California chardonnay and cabernet, or the red blends from Bordeaux. They're good wines but they command a higher price because they've become premium brands, much like you'll pay more for a BMW than a Honda Civic.

Beware of House Wines. That humble little house wine is often cheap and nasty stuff that you can use in a pinch instead of Liquid Draino. Not only are they bad to drink, they're also usually a bad buy—one of the biggest rip-offs on the list. Many restaurants price a glass at the full wholesale price of the entire bottle. With four to five glasses per bottle, that can be a 300% to 600% markup. Drinking most of them is like accidentally walking into a bad neighborhood: you're going to get roughed up and robbed—and you'll learn never to take that wrong turn again. Using the clues above, plus whether the list notes the wine's name, region and vintage, will tell you whether you can trust the house wine. Otherwise, stick to a bottle.

Choosing from a restaurant list doesn't have to be a high-wire circus act; rather it can be the start of an evening where the wine and food rise up to meet each other and bear you aloft on a cloud of sensual pleasure.

Wine and Food Events

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Frequently Asked Questions

Have you ever wanted to know which wine to choose in a certain price range? From a certain year? To match a certain dish? How to find a wine? The price of an older wine? Start a wine cellar? Find a wine club? I hope you find this a helpful resource: www.nataliemaclean.com/faq.html.


Copyright

Copyright 2005 by Natalie MacLean. All rights reserved. The content, design and graphical elements of this newsletter are copyrighted. Please ask the permission of the author before copying or using this material.